Nymphadora Tonks (pr_tonks) wrote,
Nymphadora Tonks
pr_tonks

[mood| anxious]


When I stop to think of the events of the last two weeks- my head swims.

Inferi attacks.
Draco’s visit.
Harry possibly dead.
Harry alive.
Breaking Harriet out of the Ministry.
Harriet giving birth to her baby.
Harriet moving in with Remus, Ella, and I.

Sweet mother of Merlin on a tricycle.

On top of all that, I’ve officially entered the second trimester in my pregnancy. There were days when I didn’t think I’d make it this far. Molly, Ginny, and Harry know, as well as Kingsley, so I could take at least some precaution on the job. I’m going to have to notify the rest of the Auror Department soon, but I don’t fancy taking a desk job quite yet- and Remus will perform a permanent sticking charm on my arse if I don’t sit at that desk.

And… I’ve yet to tell my parents.

I dread it, but the day has come.



When I stop to think of the events of the last two weeks- my head swims.

Inferi attacks.
Draco’s visit.
Harry possibly dead.
Harry alive.
Breaking Harriet out of the Ministry.
Harriet giving birth to her baby.
Harriet moving in with Remus, Ella, and I.

Sweet mother of Merlin on a tricycle.

On top of all that, I’ve officially entered the second trimester in my pregnancy. There were days when I didn’t think I’d make it this far. Molly, Ginny, and Harry know, as well as Kingsley, so I could take at least some precaution on the job. I’m going to have to notify the rest of the Auror Department soon, but I don’t fancy taking a desk job quite yet- and Remus will perform a permanent sticking charm on my arse if I don’t sit at that desk.

And… I’ve yet to tell my parents.

I dread it, but the day has come...

~*~


Remus sits reading the newspaper while I help Ella into her cloak.

“Where we going?” she asks, fumbling with the frog on her cloak.

“To Grandma’s,” I reply, helping her fasten the closure.

“Wot for? Am I staying there?”

Remus peers around the edge of the Daily Prophet, and I freeze. It’s the simplest, tiniest question, but guilt swarms me.

Ever since Ella was born either Remus or I have always been slipping out the back door- leaving her with someone else. Full moons, Order-related stuff, traipsing off with the Auror department- and we’ve left our little girl behind.

I look down at her little face, gazing up at me with curiosity, and I can’t help it; I burst into tears.

“I’m so sorry, sweetie,” I say, sliding down the door into a heap on the floor. I cover my face as Remus launches himself out of the chair and hurries toward us.

“Ella, go run upstairs and get Daddy’s jumper off the bed, and tell Harriet we’re going out for a bit.”

I look through my fingers and I see her little feet wriggling next to mine on the floor. “Ella is sorry, Mummy,” she says before scampering off, and it send me into another fit of tears.

“Dora,” he says calmly, kneeling by my side, peeling my hands away from my face and brushing my hair. “Shh, what’s wrong?”

“I’m a horrible mother! I’m always running off, and Ella thinks we’re leaving her, and we’re having another baby, and I’m going to be rubbish at this!”

I wrestle my hands away and cover my face again as I dissolve into tears.

“Dora-”

“I’m a bad Mum!”

“Dora-”

“And Ellie is going to grow up and hate us!”

“Nymphadora, stop. You’re a wonderful mother. Ella adores you. I adore you. And our new baby is going to adore you. Ella will grow up to be an independent woman who knows what her parents did to make her world a little better.”

I sniff and wipe my tears away. “You’re too good to me, Remus,” I say, cradling his face in my hands. “What would I do without you?”

He gathers my hands up in his and presses a kiss to them. “Marry some rich bloke and have ridiculously beautiful children- oh wait, we already have that part of the equation, don’t we?” he teases.

I laugh, smearing more tears away and lean forward pressing my lips to his. “Thank you for those beautiful children, by the way; and thank you for listening to me, and putting up with my pregnancy hormones.”

“Anytime, my love. Do you want to postpone? Tell your parents another time? Maybe it would be best if you just relaxed for a-”

“Mummy?”

Ella is standing there with Remus’ jumper balled up in her hands. I open my arms and smile as she runs toward me.

“I sorry I made you cry.”

“No, Ellie, you didn’t make Mummy cry,” I say, kissing her temple, holding her close, “Mummy and Daddy love you so much and I just want to be sure I do a good job.”

She pulls away and looks at me with a pout. “Mummy, you rock.”

Remus laughs and I fight a different kind of tears. “Thank you, Ellie Jo, you rock too.”

My poor daughter. I don’t know when the appropriate time is to tell her she’s going to be a big sister. She’s been through so much lately. I worry she’ll resent the baby; I worry she’ll resent us. I’m not ready to tell her yet. It’s still early. Maybe next month.

Remus helps me off the floor and into my cloak. We holler goodbye to Harriet, who isn’t ready to meet Mum and Dad yet, and Disapparate.

~*~


I wait until discussion is calm and even-toned. Mum and I are carrying most of the conversation, but Remus and Dad appear to be civil. Maybe their feud is over.

Ella has curled up on Remus lap and drifted off to sleep, clutching his jumper. I meet his eyes and try to refrain from smiling, but I can’t.

I clear my throat. “Mum, Dad, there’s a reason that Remus and I came here tonight.” I reach over and loop my arm through his. “We’re expecting another baby!”

Ella stirs slightly, but otherwise there is absolute silence as mum and dad stare at Remus and I.

Moments go by in silence…

“Er, Nymphadora, Remus, congratulations,” Mum says, forcing a smile. She rises from the chair and approaches me at the sofa. She sits down on the coffee table in front of me, my knees touching hers, and grasps my hands. “Do you think this is the best time, Nymphadora? It’s only been a few months since the miscarriage. Are you ready?”

I swallow and look over Mum’s shoulder at Dad, who is looking down at the floor. “Yeah, Mum, I’m ready. Remus and I are so happy.”

“What about your job?” Dad pipes in. “What about these Werewolves running about?”

“Dora loves her job, and I trust her. I suspect I shall never fully get used to being married to an Auror, but I’ve resigned myself to the fact that Dora’s job is hazardous,” Remus said calmly, adjusting Ella in his arms.

I was waiting for Dad to go off on a diatribe about Remus being a ‘dangerous creature’ but, thankfully, he didn’t.

“Yes, you carried Ella normally,” Mum says, smiling over at Remus and Ellie. “Does she know?”

I shake my head. “Not yet. It’s a bit early.”

Mum’s smile broadens. “When are you due? Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl yet?”

Her grin proves to be contagious. “No, not yet. My due date is January 25th. I go for my Foetal Werewolf test this week, and we’ll set up my next appointment then. I should be able to know the baby’s sex in another eight weeks or so.”

I watch as tears well up in my mother’s eyes as she envelopes me in her arms. “Oh, Nymphadora, I’m so happy for you,” she says excitedly, and this time I believe her.

“Thanks, Mum,” I reply, wrapping my arms around her, feeling the tears threaten again.

She kisses my head and then approaches Remus, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Congratulations,”

“Thank you, Andromeda,” he replies, blushing warmly.

I look over at my father, who sighs heavily. “Congratulations- to both of you.”

It’s the best I could hope for.

~*~


As Remus and I prepare for bed that night I stand in front of the mirror and look at my stomach. My normal jeans and pants are getting uncomfortable- I must be gaining weight. I slouch my pyjama pants down and hoist my shirt up, bunching the fabric underneath my chin as I look down.

“Oy, Daddy, am I getting chubby, yet?” I ask, getting Remus’ attention.

He smirks, and I know my answer.
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